Freewriting Day 20: An Honest Prayer

I don't want to just say words

I don't want to go through the motions

I don't wanna ask what would Jesus do

And not change

I am not satisfied

I need more

More of You to fill the empty places

Put me on the Potter's wheel

Mold me, make me

Shape me, break me

Until I'm more like You

More like You

I want to be like You in my thoughts

I want to be like You with my words

I need more 

Ordinary's not enough

Pull me in closer

Let Your fire consume me

Take away everything that's not of You

I need more grace

I need patience

I need wisdom

I'm through goin' 'round in circles

I'm through straddling the fence

I've decided this is the dividing line

I don't care what others think

I need more

I'm dying of thirst

I'm dying the way I am 

God, save me

Save me from myself

I know I've said that before

But it's a continual process

I don't know everything

And I never will

I've accepted that

I'm not goin' back

I'm all in

I've got nothin' to lose

And everything to gain

Lord, take me deeper than I've ever been before

I'm tired of this place

Tired of being stagnant

Tired of standing still

I know there's more

I'm all in

No more holding back

No more questioning

I need You more than anything

You gave Your best

Over and over You laid down everything

You didn't care about comfort

You didn't care about fame

You didn't seek out praise or the accolades of man

You gave Your life 

So the least I can do is give You mine