The Journey Ahead Part 3

I wasn't home free when I was discharged from the hospital. I had a lot of challenges ahead of me. The doctors thought it would be best that I start physical therapy as early as possible. I started physical therapy at six months old, but my life has been anything but normal (although my mom believed firmly in treating me no different than my brother. I'm so grateful for that).

I've had lots of surgeries, so I plan to do a brief overview of each one.


1998: I had this one at 9 years old. They broke both of my hips and put in hardware because the cerebral palsy made my feet turn in to the point of tripping.

2004: I had to have new hardware put in my left hip because my leg was starting to turn in again. The doctor also moved a muscle from my quads to help my leg bend better.

2006: I had both sets of hardware taken out of my hips. Little did I know, the hardware wasn't supposed to be left in that long. A hip replacement would have been in my future had I not had this done.

2007: I had a spinal fusion done to my back. This was a very intense surgery. They had to fuse some of my vertebrates because my back had broken(it had been broken a year, but no one knew it...another story for another post)

In 2008, I started having hip pain, which I knew was from a condition known as bursitis. A bursa is a sack filled with fluid that can happen from overusing your joints. I don't want to go into all of the gory medical details, so suffice it to say, something weird happened to my hip. :)

2013: I had my big toe fused on my left foot and my Achilles tendon(more commonly called heel cord) lengthened. 

2014: The Achilles tendon and post tibial tendon on my right foot were lengthened. 

My life has had its share of twists and turns, but I'm still here. The doctors had said that I would be blind, deaf, and require speech therapy, but God worked his magic. I'm now a junior in college and on the Dean's List. To top things off, I am majoring in Communication of all things(and never needed speech therapy)! I don't say this to brag, but to show the greatness of my God.

Through my journey, I've had the chance to meet some amazing people. I can't say enough of about the doctors that work tirelessly on my behalf. I know I could never express my heartfelt gratitude, but thank you. Thank you for helping me despite the criticisms from others. Thank you for trying one new medicine. Thank you for never giving up. Without God on my side and an amazing team of people surrounding me, I wouldn't be here. Thank you for giving me an opportunity to live. Not to live hooked to machines, (I'm thankful for medical technology, I'm not belittling those that do. I've been there, too), but to really live.

I've also met some wonderful families who are on this crazy ride with me. Instead of play dates, we go to the doctor's office. Instead of laughing at a movie, we laugh a the hospital clown.

Thank you all for taking the time to share your stories with me. They were full of inspiration and hope. They were a good distraction from the obvious while in the waiting room. It would be impossible to name all of you, but know that I remember. I remember the curly haired little girl who told me of her frustrations about becoming a ninth grader. I remember the story of the blond haired toddler who is confined to a wheelchair and can't interact with his little brother because of a drowning incident. I remember the then 16 year old boy in the hospital room next to me who was leaving Red Lobster and had a life changing accident. His mom came to my room daily to get inspiration, to see hope in living form. I remember the 16 year old black girl who had to have a spinal fusion up to her neck. Her little baby cousin would come in to see me almost everyday. I was touched by that little girl because she wasn't afraid to touch me or talk to me. Just as I've enjoyed your stories, I hope mine has helped you. I've always said, "If I can help one person by telling my story, it's worth it."

P.S. Here's a picture of me now.


*To celebrate my blogoversary, I'm having a giveaway! Look for it in the coming days.*

Just When They Thought it Couldn't get any Worse Part 2

Since we were born early, chaos ensued. I had to be hooked up to a ventilator right away.

Minutes after birth, both of my lungs collapsed a total of four times. To correct this, I was hooked up to a ventilator. The doctors tried this for a day or so, but weren't seeing results. I was a very sick baby. Mama knew the jet ventilator could cause a brain bleed, but she had to let them put me on it. There were no other options. I was then put on a jet ventilator which beat four hundred times per minute. This was a lot on my little body, so I had a brain bleed on the right side. For those of you who aren't familiar with this, let me explain. When a brain bleed happens, it affects the opposite side of the brain. The entire left side of my body is weaker than the right side. The brain bleed is why I have cerebral palsy. My brother also faced his share of obstacles as an infant. While he didn't have cerebral palsy, he did have to be hooked up to an oxygen tank.

I was hooked up to so many wires and tubes that the nurses had to put an IV in my head. As I lay there in my incubator, I was fighting for my life. I lost down to 1 lb. 6 oz. during my NICU stay and my brother lost down to 1 lb. 10 oz. We were micro preemies. My brother and I were so sick that nurses would call my parents with updates during the night. My mom said they hardly got any sleep because they never knew when they were going to get a call or have to come to the hospital.

Mama came to Greenville Memorial every day to come see us. The nurses told Mama and other family members to talk to us regularly. It wasn't the traditional hospital visit where people come in and Ooh and Aah over the babies. Mama said there was a serious tone in the NICU. Every where they turned they saw a sick baby. What is even more heartbreaking is that several babies had no one to come see them. Mama didn't get to hold my brother and I for months. She couldn't feed or bathe us. The only connection to us was her voice. The nurses also recommend playing music, so Mama brought a pink music box with a silk overlay and placed it above my incubator and blue one for my brother. The nurses played it every day. Even the soothing music couldn't drown out what happened next.

At one point, the nurse came in and told Mama something no other mother should ever have to hear. She said, "I'm sorry, we've done all we can do for your daughter. She's gone."

Mama didn't know God like she does today, but she knew to pray. She went out in the hall by herself to gather her thoughts. She cried because of what the nurse said. God asked her,
"What are you crying for?" This was the first time she had ever heard God speak to her. She cried out to God saying, "God, you gave her to me, but if she's going to be a vegetable take her on. If not, I want a 180 degree turnaround." Granny called my Aunt Sherrie and told her so her church could pray.

About five minutes later, the nurse came back in and said I had done a 180 degree turnaround. When the doctors had given up all hope, God had something up his sleeve. The years that followed were filled with joy, laughter, frustration, and things that were never expected.

To be continued...

This is the very first picture of me.

*Since this is part of my life, this will be part of my Memories Rewind post. It's emotionally draining to go back and write about this, but it is what it is. There's no funny story today, just me almost 20 years ago.*

Today marks my 100th post. I'll post more about it on Thursday.

The Girl Behind the Blog

I want to thank you for all waiting so patiently for this post. I think the time has come for you to know more about me, and since my blogoversary is coming up I wanted to mix it up this week. I'm not talking about the standard ice breaker questions either. I'm going to be transparent with you.

There are a few reasons why I didn't share everything about myself to begin with. I didn't want people to read my blog because they felt sorry for me. I wanted genuine readers that read because they wanted to.

One thing I'm sure you are all wondering is why I go to so many doctor appointments. You will know after these posts. Since my story is detailed, I'm going to break it up in three posts so that I can explain it. After all, what good is my writing if my readers can't understand it?

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A Race Against Time Part 1

My mom was six months pregnant with twins. She went to work like any other day. She came home and fixed a supper of fried potatoes and hot dogs. Then, it happened--her water broke over the stove of all places. She called the doctor. They had to get to the hospital and quick. My Papa drove like a madman to Hospital A. The gynecologist looked at her and knew the hospital wasn't equipped to handle what was about to happen. The doctors phoned Hospital B and Hospital C in North Carolina to see if they had any lung machines available. They didn't. Hospital G Memorial came through.

Dr. Monty Lafatte came in the room. He examined her. She was having contractions and dilated 4 cm. They waited to see if the contractions would stop. They didn't, so the doctor asked Mama if she'd be willing to try something new. It was called the Lung Surfactant shot, and it was supposed to help make the lungs develop faster. They told her she would have to sign a consent form for them to be able to do it. She said, "OK, do it" because the pain was unbearable. The shot did help some, but it wasn't enough. They told her she was being prepped for an immediate C-section. She asked, "Can you leave her in?" They said they couldn't do it.

All she had for pain was an epidural. She said she was awake the entire time. After the C-Section, Mama got to see my brother and me for a short time. She said she didn't fully grasp how little we were. I was 2 lbs 3 oz and my brother was 2 lbs. 19 oz. She heard a faint cry from me, then they wheeled us to the NICU. Little did she know that we'd be staying there for three long months...

To be continued...

Click to read Part 2 
Click to read Part 3