Monday, December 22, 2014

You Don't Understand

Man with a megaphone 2 Bartek Ambrozik via

I understand. It's a phrase that I hear quite often. As someone who has to take it day by day, you don't understand. You don't understand what I go through.

You don't understand what it's like to be fine in the morning and be zapped of all energy by mid-afternoon.

You don't understand what it's like to be woken up out of a somewhat good night's sleep by waves of nausea that come and go.

You don't understand what it's like to feel tingling and aches sometimes all throughout the day.

You don't understand what it's like to say you're coming to an event and then have to postpone it indefinitely because you just can't go.

You don't understand what it's like not being able to play certain things with my nephews.

You don't understand what it's like to not be able to pick up my nephews.

Now, some people DO understand. Those who have helped care for someone with a chronic illness know what I am talking about to a certain extent. The majority of people don't understand, and it is incredibly frustrating to try and explain things to them.  

I am not a negative person, and I never have been. In spite of all of life's curveballs, I have made a choice to be positive. I choose joy regardless of what my body does. I don't talk about how I feel. I praise God and sing songs even when my body is screaming in protest of whatever I am trying to do. It's called fighting the good fight of faith. No one ever said life would be easy, but I do have control over how I react to things.

This is not a pity party. I just need to vent.  Unless you are in my body, you have no clue what I go through on a daily basis. Maybe instead of saying, "I understand," please think before you say this because you never will. And the thing is, I don't expect anyone to. I just expect people to be respectful and not just say things to be saying it. If you want to say something, be encouraging. I can always use that. And if you can't be encouraging, just don't say anything.